NovelBookAlena
Most of my childhood memories were lost among the midst of growing up because | was always in survival
mode, filtering off the bad ones. Nobody knew how hard it was to sneak around when my parents weren't looking
just to catch a glimpse of what was happening. Blood. Guns and knives.
Those things were common in this family. Papa-my father tried to keepaway from the life he was born into
because he said it was too dangerous. Imagine the look on my face when | turned fifteen and he immediately
started teachingon how to hold a gun to someone's head.
The damn irony.
What was he even thinking? Shieldingfrom harm's way but as soon as | was fifteen, he showed me
everything. The things he was hidingfrom, the business talks at night and his men who somehow ended up
disappearing. Only they didn't disappear. They were just six feet under.
"In this world, there is only survival." His words were loud and clear, tattooed in my mind.
Now, don't getwrong. He was the perfect father to his three children and a loving husband to Mama but to
the Bratva, he was a merciless leader. They feared him but the most important thing of all, they respected him.
Papa did everything to make us happy. He taught us the things any father would, like to ride a bike, setting up
camp and how to drive. He was there, he was present in our lives, and he gave us everything he had.
It was just, sometimes, | had to remove the uneasiness of knowing he was a killer.
A cold-blooded killer.
Alexei, my brother, was three years older than me. The minute he turned eighteen, every single responsibility
was given to him whether he liked it or not, but I think, he enjoyed the power he had and the women who threw
themselves at him.
He was like Papa, always worrying about the family and our safety because he was scared that one day,
someone might put a bullet in his head and left the rest of us to fend for ourselves.
Then again, Papa wanted nothing more than a strong family. He taught us how to hunt, how to run and how to
kill. He wanted us to defend ourselves if things ever went wrong.
Remember how he said there is only survival in this world? Well, he made sure we never forgot who we were. We
weren't any ordinary family, and we would never be. As much as | tried to deny the fact, we were Bratva itself.
Most of my girlfriends grew up becoming socialites.
The shop-till-you-drop kind of socialites. The mingling-with-rich-men kind of socialites. The always-wearing-high-
heels kind of socialites. The perfect kind of socialites.
So, imagine the look on Papa and Mama's faces when | told them | wanted to beca doctor. An orthopedic,
even.
Well, Mama was okay with it because she always convincedto follow my heart. She knew the future was in
my hands even though Papa was trying to kill my future plans. It tookawhile to finally convince him that |
was never going to be like my friends. | was never going to shop every day, drink wine and socialize my night
away because despite being in a family where killing was normal, | actually wanted to save lives.
That was when the persuading started.
No, not frombut from him.
I had always wanted a dog since | was ten, but he never wanted one. He wasn't very fond of furry animals, so |
was surprised when | found myself waking up to him holding a golden retriever puppy. The golden retriever
puppy even had a red bowtie around his neck. Did that holdback from wanting to go to medical school? No.
The persuading just kept going on and on.
After the 'puppy surprise’, he brought ha pink Aston Martin the next day. A Vanquish Zagato Aston Martin. |
told him to stop wasting his money because nothing was going to change my mind.
Oh boy, it didn't stop there. A bouquet of sunflowers every morning on my bed. Flight tickets for a trip to
Maldives. New designer handbags.
| was spoilt in different ways, and | took the opportunity to enjoy everything.
"You'd be drowning in books, Alena!" He said, pacing the room back and forth before pinching the bridge of his
nose.
"I don't mind. I've always loved learning,"
"I've given you everything, my love. You don't have to struggle for anything in your life," he walked closer
towardsas he grabbed a hold of my hand.
Mama smiled as she grabbed Papa's hands, "Your daughter has passion."
"She doesn't have to go through all of the trouble." He shook his head.
"Papa, growing up, you taughtto always stand up for myself. You taughtto be strong and independent.
You also taughtto have dreams and be passionate in the things I love. I'm becoming the woman you taught
Mama kept caressing his arm while occasionally glancing at me.
"I don't want to have anything to do with the mafia, Papa. You know that."
"You were born into it, whether you like it or not."
"Well, | don't like it!" | walked away, sighing.
Papa's green eyes stared into mine. | knew he was holding back his anger because he felt as if | was never
grateful for the things, he provided for us. All the love, the attention and the never ending wants. | had broken
his heart into two.
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"I'm leaving to medical school. If you don't want to supportin any way, I'll just get a part-tjob. I'd do
whatever it takes forto achieve my dreams," | muttered as my vision blurred with tears.
Then, I pushed the doors and stormed out of the room-bumping into Alexei, who was eavesdropping in the
hallway.
Our eyes collided for a few seconds.
| knew he felt sorry for me. | knew he wanted to givewhat | wanted. We were always close because of the
little age-gap we had. | guess we just understood each other better but he was in no position to offerthe
things | wanted. So, he kept his distance and watchedleave.
To my surprise, Papa ended up paying for everything.
Mama probably persuaded him to do so, and he was never the man to deny her. Mama won his heart from the
moment they first met. They were endless lovers, not just husband and wife. Their relationship was what |
wanted in the future a beautiful marriage.
Well, Papa also assigned a bodyguard forIgor. He kept his distance whenever | saw him around but most of
the time, he was out of sight. He was lurking in the shadows, always keeping an eye on me, and probably
reported everything to Papa but it didn't bothermuch because | got what | wanted. | got the chance to
pursue my dreams.
Igor was there forwhen the days were bad. Sometimes, the nights were bad, too.
We talked, occasionally.
Other than Igor keeping an eye on me, Mama was always asking whether things were going great. She kept up
with my daily life in university. Papa never called and honestly, | never blamed him. | was being the ungrateful
daughter and it was best to keep my distance,
too.
We grew apart but | knew he asked Mama about me. Whenever | saw Igor, | knew he was keepingsafe by
having him around.
"Do you have children, Igor?" | asked, as | took a bite of my sandwich.
We were both sitting on a bench in the park, enjoying the warm breeze. It was my regular routine to go on an
afternoon walk and Igor would always join me. | knew he secretly enjoyed our walks, too but he never talked
much.
"I have a son." He replied, looking around he was never off-guard, always checking around if we would somehow
be ambushed or attacked.
He was trained that way. Besides, he was assigned to protect his boss' daughter.
"How old is he?"
"He just turned ten."
"Don't you miss him?"
"All the time."
"You should spend twith him,"
"He doesn't know | exist," he replied, and it didn't takelong to meet his eyes.
"What? Why not?"
"It's to keep him safe. Enemies wouldn't find out about our families, and we wouldn't be a target if anything
happens. Besides, he doesn't have to know that his father is a criminal."
The conversation ended just like that. My mind drifted away to Papa, makingwonder if he was forced to
accept this life, too. He was born into it, just like me. Maybe if he could, he would've wanted a different life. A
different possibility for his children. Yet, he was responsible to the Bratva and his men.
Sthings had to be sacrificed.
Thad passed and here | was, at the age of thirty, in my final year of residency.
| stared at my reflection in the mirror before sighing. My eyes were red because the last t| slept was
probably twenty-six hours ago. My cheekbones were hollow, and my lips were slightly chapped from being
dehydrated.
"Fuck!" Someone cursed, makingturn.
Lily, my colleague stepped out of the cubicle and stood beside me. Her eyes were red, but | assumed it wasn't
from the lack of sleep, she just started her shift but probably from all the crying the restroom. She tried to fix her
hair by running her fingers through them before tying the blonde strands into a bun.
"Is everything okay?" | asked.
"I'm just having a bad day."
"Is it John?"
"Shit. You see right through me, don't you? is it the eyes? Do | look like I've been crying?" She asked, turning to
look atas she blinked a few times as if that was going to make her eyebags any less visible.
"What eyes? | couldn't tell a thing." My lips curved into a smile.
"Alena..."
"You always cry about John. If you're unhappy, you don't have to put up with him."
"I'm not unhappy. | just don't know why he chose to not understand about my situation. He wantsto be there
for him all the twhen it's pretty obvious, | can't. He's a freelancer and he has a lot of free time. | don't."
"Have you tried talking to him?"
"Oh, I've tried the whole ‘communication is key" thing."
"I wish you two can figure things out. You can't keep crying in the restroom."
Lily smiled, shaking her head as he applied lip balm on her lips. "Don't worry about me, Alena. I'll be fine. You, on
the other hand, should really get srest."
"I'm off tomorrow."
"Spending the rest of your day off in bed?"
"Sleeping my sorrows away." | joked, leaving the restroom, and heading down the hospital hallway.
| glanced down at my wristwatch, seeing that | have one last patient before I leave.
Honestly, if | were given the chance to look back and meet my younger self, | never thought she'd make it this
far. The whole journey to beca doctor was harder than it looked. It was worth the struggle and the sleepless
nights, but it was exhausting.
| knocked on the door before stepping in, seeing my patient's face light up as soon as he saw me. He was always
like that. Snurses said he was looking forward to meetingeven though he was only admitted last week.
| had my fair share of flirtatious patients. They were sometimes funny.
"There she is, my favorite doctor."
"Mr. Williams, you haven't touched your food."
"| told you many times. Just callAdam."
"Right... Adam, how did you sleep last night?" One of the nurses walked in, taking a pen and a notepad in case
she needed to jolt down anything.
"| slept okay. Thanks to the painkillers you prescribed me."
"That's good. Your swelling went down a lot, too. You can discharge soon." | smiled, standing next to him, and
further inspecting his shoulder.
Mr. Williams-Adam, was around my age and not older than thirty-five. He fell off the stairs at his house and
ended up with a fractured shoulder.
As | was inspecting his shoulder, he was busy staring into my eyes. The smile he had on his face was
entertaining, as if he was a teenager who had a crush on an older woman. He never seemed to bothermuch
during his stay here, but he kept flirting and | completely ignored him. Besides, | was never interested in dating
my patients or dating anyone in particular.
"Has anyone ever told you how mesmerizing your eyes?"
Our eyes met, "I received compliments about them."
"Well, you deserve them. You're absolutely beautiful."
"They are, aren't they?" | smiled, leaning back before checking the machine on his right, reading his heartbeat.
"Are you ... perhaps, single?"
"No, | hate to disappoint you but I'm not." The lie was as smooth as butter. It was a habit to lie to patients about
my marital status if they started to get a bit hopeful. | had been asked out on dates and | had politely declined
each one of them. The easiest escape was to tell them | was married.
One would be too crazy to bother a married woman.
"I don't see a ring on your finger." He glanced down at my hands, "Can | take you out on a date?"
The attending nurse besideshifted, shaking her head as she pretended not to hear anything. She wanted to
laugh, and it was obvious she was holding it back, but | kept my poker face on, ignoring his attempts.
"I don't wear my ring when I'm working. It's an expensive piece." | replied.
"That's right... Dr. Orlov's husband would always cand pick her up from work." My attending nurse, Karla,
added and occasionally glancing at my direction a few times. She was quite close to me, and she knew how
many patients had try to takeout on a date. "I see." Adam cleared his throat, leaning back.
"If that's everything, I'll draft out a plan for your recovery. I'll see you next week," Karla and | walked out, closing
the door behind us.
Karla chuckled, holding the notepad close to her chest. "That would be tenth this week?"
"Twentieth."
"You must be exhausted from all the compliments, Alena."
"| feed off compliments." | joked and we laughed.
"Well, your shift's over. You had a long one. Please, get srest."
"I'll see you next week, Karla."
As soon as | reached my car in the basement, | stepped inside and let out a long sigh. I leaned back in my seat
after starting the engine.
All | could think of at the moment was to go home. That was until my phone started ringing, makinglook
Follow on Novᴇl-Onlinᴇ.cᴏmdown to see it was my brother. Alexei.
"Alena," he said on the other line.
"To what do | owe this pleasure of you calling me?"
He chuckled, "I'm doing great. Thank you for asking."
"How are you, Alyosha?"
"I'm fine. | just got hfrom beating someone to death,"
| frowned, clearing my throat. "I do not need to know that."
"Too much information?"
"Why are you calling me?" | asked.
"Con, | haven't talked to you in a while. How are things going at work?"
"We don't need the small talk. Just get straight to the point, please."
Alexei sighed, clearly annoyed. | could imagine him pinching the bridge of his nose a habit he inherited from
Papa. He was probably leaning on his seat and planning out his next plan, probably he was going to beat
someone else to death. Then again, he had taken Papa's position in the Bratva.
"| just want to remind you about tonight." He spoke.
"Tonight? What about tonight?"
"The charity gala. You'd be expected to join, or Papa would have my head."
"Why would he have your head? You're the Pakhan, now. Not him."
"When it comes to you, I'm a mere slave. Besides, you made a deal with him when you wanted to go into
medical school in case you forgot." He continued to talk, "You must attend every single event that involves our
family. You are still a Bratva princess, Alena." | cursed under my breath in Russian. "I hate it when you remind me
that."
"You've made it this far... what makes tonight any different?"
"I'm just tired. | had a long shift and all | could think of is to go have a long bath and sleep."
"Just be there tonight, please? | don't want him to get mad at you. Fuck, | don't want him to get mad at me.
Besides, Ana and | haven't seen you in months. She misses you."
Ana or Anastasia, our sister. The youngest in the family and most loved. She was eight when | started to move
out of the house and furthered my studies. We didn't have a lot of ttogether but whenever | chome
during the holidays or my free time, we'd bond. Alexei and | would run to the ends of the earth for her.
Now, she was already a woman, thriving at the age of twenty.
"You miss me, too?"
He kept quiet for a couple of seconds, "Severely."
"How is she, by the way?" | asked, about Ana.
"Our baby sister is doing well. She has a boyfriend now,"
"Does Papa know?"
"They met a few times."
"And he's okay with it?"
"Surprisingly. | did run a background check on him and he's clean. Ana seems to be very happy ever since he
caround,"
"And you?"
"What about me?"
"Who's your girlfriend of the week?"
He laughed, "I don't date, Alena. | have my fun with them and that's it."
"Karma is going to cback at you, Alyosha. | know it."
"If I'm still alive for karma to cget me. You better make sure to attend tonight or I'll be on the news
tomorrow. | mean it, Alena."
"Yeah, I'll be there. Sendthe address and everything,"
"Sent. Oh, and Alena?"
"What else?"
""Don't be late."
Then, he hung up the phone.
My brother, Alexei, took over as Pakhan after Papa retired. Now, Papa and Mama spent most of their time
travelling the world. They wanted to enjoy the world while they still can. Alexei was left to take care of
everything. Every single responsibility was on his shoulders. Papa expected anything but failure from him.
He was never going to disappoint, anyway.
I had to be there tonight. Besides, | haven't seen Ana and | missed her.
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